I could float endlessly in the
Shadows that pool near my feet.
Adjacent to the angels where
The rabbit hole has taken form.
I could free-fall through sulfuric updrafts
Slowed down by no more than friction
With eyes wide and thoughts ponderous
As to what bottom I should be hitting this time
Off of mountain-tops I could scream
Bellowing what air I could grasp and
Discharge. Echoing the revulsion of a
Hollowed out shell, bereft and adrift.
I could wall this all up inside and feed
Off of myself until my Inner Light fractures
Through my skin. The weakening ever-expanding
From the gnawing and clawing and fading.
I could sit at the threshold of an open doorway
My knees to my chin, tendons stretching, eyes
Straining to see the outline of a bed
In a darkened room left empty from loss but full of life
I could sink like a stone and travel the distance to
The ocean floor. I could fly on the wings of angels
And accept the clouds for the simplicity that they contain.
It could all be done in one fell swoop, I just need to find out how.