Sarah and Maynard

I plagiarize my show of strength off
Songs by Sarah and Maynard.

And if you don't understand
I would appreciate it if you would turn
Your blind eyes from my weak candle's flame.

I allow their music to speak to me in ways
That I can't speak to myself..
I'm confused and hopelessly expectant..
But I'm comfortable here,
Perched upon my watch tower,
Waiting for the armor to soften
Drumming fingers, while I
Feel the wash of desperate hopefulness
Batter my flanks and weaken my base.

And with crushing bar chords,
Screeching voices,
Anger driving melody,
Careening obscenely across my expanse,
I can feel that someone understands,
Watching in my direction from a distance
Made to seem so close, when I close my eyes
To gauge his intensity and meaning.

I put my faith in a man
Who would rather not know me,
But sings his music in a way as to
Send me a personal I told you so
At decibels that grab me by the scruff
And point me towards spiritual North.

And his emotional timber holds hands
With a melodic siren sitting with her
Back against a cold brick wall, nodding
Her head in time with an anguished heartbeat.

Soft piano plays
And my bitter soul floats in a sea
Of understand and longing
For someone I've never met and probably never will

In the arms of angels
We are supposed to be saved!
So says she that sings
Of being lost and hopeless!

And yet her ire speaks to me of
Truth and knowledge, accompanied by a sly smile
That says "trust me or not, i'm bound for
The greater things on the other side of this
Cold blue raging sea".  She holds her hand out to me
As she walks and drags her dress along the
Frothy peaks of the saltwater giant.

I have yet to be convinced that life is
Not nearly as embattled as the pervasive
Demons pulling strings behind my eyes,
Hiding in the crevices between my dreams and
My nightmares.  But if I find myself with nothing
Left but scar tissue and good intentions to share
I'll have the grand satisfaction of knowing that
At least two people won't be afraid to hold my hand.